Positive parenting at kids’ mealtimes.

First it’s breast or bottle, onto solids – then into toddlerhood and beyond. Every change brings discovery and excitement – and often, some worry as well. Are they getting enough? What foods will give them the nutrition they need – and which ones aren’t all they cracked up to be? A GP answers some of those concerns.

Sydney GP, Doctor Bec*, sees many parents with concerns about their young children’s eating habits. The good news? According to Dr Bec, most of those concerns are relatively easy to address.

Noochy asked Doctor Bec for some basic dos and don’ts for keeping those worries at bay, and setting your kids and yourself up for healthy eating success.
First and foremost, she says, is to recognise that many worries stem from parent behaviour and expectations, rather than any issue with the kids.

“It’s easy for parents to place too much pressure and emphasis on eating and nutrition, and that anxiety can transfer to the child,” she explains. “Moving away from that mindset and practising positive parenting skills instead can be a great help. That means being calm, confident and consistent about their eating – not always easy, but it really is the best thing you can do.”

From there, Doctor Bec offers some tips to help ensure they’re getting the nutrition they need.

Top nutrition tips

1. If they refuse the food you have offered then try not to get frustrated, put the food to one side and maybe represent it later. Try not to get into the habit of making other options at mealtime, if they refuse the first one and definitely don't fall into the trap of giving a big dessert serving instead to make up for the meal!
2. Focus on iron, one of the most common deficiencies in kids. Broadly, iron comes in two forms – ‘haem’ iron from meat; and ‘non-haem’ iron from plants such as leafy greens. Include both. If you’re vegetarian, put in the time to work out how much iron they’re getting. If in doubt, ask your doctor about a supplement.
3. Food combinations matter. Milk inhibits iron absorption, so avoid serving it with an iron-rich meal. On the other hand, acidic foods containing vitamin C (ascorbic acid) enhance iron absorption, so team iron rich meals with foods such as tomatoes, citrus and other foods with high vitamin C content.
4. A lot of younger kids don’t like ‘meaty’ looking meat, so minced options – especially beef – are great for boosting iron intake.
5. Avoid over-reliance on milk. After about nine months, babies and toddlers have wider food and nutrition needs. Giving your child too much can reduce their appetite for other essential foods. Try other dairy foods such as yoghurt and cheese, and look for tasty calcium sources, such as broccoli, almonds, bony fish such as tinned salmon.

After your child eats certain foods, don’t mistake a common ‘contact reaction’, such as a rash around the mouth, for an allergy. (See link below for more about food allergies and kids). A nappy rash, especially for girls, is another common contact reaction. More acidic foods, such as tomatoes, are often involved. If this happens, stop that food for a few weeks and reintroduce it again later. You may need to do this a few times until their body becomes accustomed to it.

When to visit the Doctor

1. Your child is not putting on weight over a reasonable period of weeks to months, depending on their age.
2. If they have persistent diarrhoea, or if the stool is persistently unformed and it regularly contains undigested food.
3. If they have blood or mucus in their stools.
4. If your child is persistently narrow, regimented and anxious in their eating behaviour, especially in combination with other behaviour that’s not what you’d expect for their age.

“Often it’s nothing at all, or a common behavioural stage. It can also be something as simple as a low-grade ear infection or other viral infection that may be slowing them down a bit. Sleep apnoea can also be a culprit,” says Doctor Bec. “The main thing is to get reassurance by getting it assessed.”

Finally, Doctor Bec reminds us again about the power of positive parenting. 

“Staying calm, confident and consistent as much as you can is the best way to enjoy all aspects of parenting, including mealtimes,” she says.

Where to find out more

If you want more information about your child’s nutritional needs, see Noochy’s Easy goodness guide: how much is enough? and associated links.

For some hints on positive parenting and staying calm, confident and consistent at mealtimes, see Noochy’s article Making mealtimes fun. Top tips for contented.

You can find out more about allergy prevention in children and babies on the ASCIA website.